Working with anxiety

The subject I chose this time is something I have wanted to write about for some time now. It's not a hard subject for me actually, because I have learned to live with it. But what makes it hard today is that every time someone finds out about it, they look at me like I am freak who manages day by day. Like I would just snap or explode any second. Ticking time-bomb. I want to write about it, so people who have anxiety can smile, say that "I'm not alone" and cope better. And so people who have no idea what it's like, I want to open your eyes.

So, here we go.

What is an anxiety attack?
  Simply, it's a reaction to a situation where you don't know how you are supposed to act or what you are supposed to do. Sometimes there is too much going around, sounds, lights, voices, feelings etc. and you don't know where to focus, so your heartbeat rises, you feel unable to move any muscle on your body on any way and you have the urge to back off from the situation; taking some physical distance can make a difference and cooling yourself off can help pick up the pieces in your mind and make you able to work through the situation.
  When it gets worse with me, I'm usually alone. I lose the sense of time, I feel like my body parts are falling off, so I lie down and hold myself together. Breathing gets hard. Tears start falling. I start to feel like control of everything has slipped through my fingers, everything has taken away from me. When it gets this bad, I can't snap out of it on my own.

What does it feel like?
  It makes me feel powerless. Sometimes it's not that bad, like some needle pinching me now and then. Sometimes it's like someone ripped my chest and stomach open, ripped my lungs out and held them in front of me. Usual thing I feel is that I can't breathe. Like someone sucked all air out f my body and left me with nothing. I get stuck and it takes a while to recover from it. Tears start falling and I really want to lie down and hold myself together.

How to live with anxiety?
  Talking about it helps, and it doesn't have to be a professional listened. Friends, family, anyone willing to listen can help. Just don't take every advise or "tomorrow will be better" lame sentences, tell them that you don't need anything else but a listening pair of ears. Soft, but not forceful touch can do the trick too.
  Also learning to not bottle things up; when it pours over, it pours out good and can lead to not-wanted attention and destroying relationships, friendships... you name it. I have fond exercise helpful, but everyone is different. Nature, silence and everything that makes you feel relaxed is good.
  You should throw yourself into situations. The more you dare to do so, it pushes the anxiety away. It's scary and feels weird and can hurt in beginning, but by time you learn to react in new situations better. You learn to let go of the need to be in control and when the need fades a little, you actually control yourself better.

Will it ever go away?
  Nope. You can fade it a little, or turn into a pill popping junkie, but it will be there. And what people around you have to handle is hard and probably frustrating. But you can find people around you who can help you around. When I have an attack on first-aid, my friends never asked or talked or wondered about it, they gave me my much needed space. Every time I have had an attack, it started like a wildfire; fast and burning. But no-one knows the signs. No-one usually notices or dares to say something.
  But with the right people around you, who listen and give you space. Who love you and who let you be there for them, so you feel equal.

I hope this helped some of you. It sure helped me.